A Prayer for Everyone

The Agnostic Prayer

Insofar as I may be heard by anything, which may or may not care what I say, I ask, if it matters, that I be forgiven for anything I may have done or failed to do which requires forgiveness.

Conversely, if not forgiveness but something else may be required to insure any possible benefit for which I may be eligible after the destruction of my body, I ask that this, whatever it may be, be granted or withheld, as the case may be, in such a way as to insure my receiving said benefit.

I ask this in my capacity as my elected intermediary between myself and that which might not be myself, but which may have an interest in the matter of my receiving as much of said benefit as it is possible for me to receive of this thing, and which may in some way be influenced by this ceremony.

Ramen.